快进来批判一下我写的邮件吧!!!在线讨论!!期待高手诊断!

steve.zhang
客户: dear mr. xxx, thanks for your email dated march 11, 2013. we he noted your products range and the information about your company from your website.??we will be very happy to cooperate with your company for our market requirements for structural steel plate, pressure vessel/boiler steel plate, steel pipes, etc., and will contact you when we he enquiries for such materials.??but it is very important to emphasize the fact that we are looking for suppliers who can fully comply with??the specifications and conditions of our clients and who can supply quality materials and can fulfill delivery of the materials within the required and confirmed delivery period.??we cannot afford any delay or rejection of the materials.??as regards pipes, we can accept only materials from baosteel, tpco, hengyang valin steel tube and pangyang chengdu, who are the approved vendors of oil companies in kuwait. we look forward to the opportunity of cooperating with your company and awaiting to hear from you further. regards 我的回复: dear mr. xxx, thank you for your kind reply and concern about our company very much. i appreciated your sincere intention to cooperate with us. we also hope to build long-term co-operation with your esteemed company. meanwhile, i he realized your strict claims on material, delivery time and especially for pipes, only products which were approved by oil companies in kuwait can be accept. we may be unable to offer all your required products for each time. but if we promise to supply for you, we assure that our products and service will be in exact accordance with the terms of the contract. we will try our best to establish a kind cooperation without complaint and delay such as our consistent desire and action. look forward to your enquiries which will be highly appreciated.
2013-05-30 322阅读
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AI回答:
Dear Mr. xxx,

Thank you for sharing your email with me. I have gone through your message and can provide some suggestions for improvement. Please find the revised version below:

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Dear Mr. xxx,

Thank you for your email dated March 11, 2013.

We have reviewed the information regarding your company and product range on your website. We are very interested in establishing a cooperation with your company to meet our market requirements for structural steel plate, pressure vessel/boiler steel plate, steel pipes, and other related materials. When we have inquiries for such materials, we will be in touch with you.

It is crucial to emphasize that we are looking for suppliers who can fully comply with our clients' specifications and conditions, and who can provide high-quality materials within the agreed-upon delivery period. Timely delivery without any delay or rejection of the materials is of utmost importance to us. Concerning pipes, we can only accept materials from approved vendors of oil companies in Kuwait, such as Baosteel, TPCO, Hengyang Valin Steel Tube, and Pangyang Chengdu.

We are looking forward to the opportunity to cooperate with your company and await your further response.

Regards,

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I have made a few changes to enhance the clarity and professionalism of your email. Please note that it is always a good idea to proofread your message for any spelling or grammar errors before sending it.

Let me know if I can assist you further with anything else.
2023-07-02
追问:
  • steve.zhang
    楼主回得太"客套"了
    客户已经明确提到他对产品的要求,如果OK,那就直接回复他能
    达不到,那也没必要浪费时间
    不一定所有的客人都喜欢跟中国人打太极
    2013-05-31
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